Dealing With a Difficult Boss and Teacher

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Dealing With a Difficult Boss and Teacher

Summary

The working process includes not only direct professional tasks execution but also communication between bosses and subordinates. Often, these relationships can be difficult, leading to misunderstandings and reduced productivity. However, choosing the right strategy for managing the relationship with the boss will prevent the subordinate from experiencing additional stress and frustration. While boss relationship mediation is most common in the work environment, students in school often have to deal with difficult teachers as well.

Dealing with a Difficult Teacher: Situation

In particular, in the last two years of high school, I had difficulty communicating with my English teacher, which negatively affected my academic performance. Difficulties arose when a new English teacher was appointed, and I could not immediately find a common language with him. At that time, I was fond of literature and was well-read, which often made literature classes irrelevant for me. I felt that by visiting classes, I did not receive the necessary knowledge and was stagnating in my development, which caused a feeling of wasted time in me. This circumstance often led to conflicts, as I neglected the instructions of the teacher and showed disrespect for him.

However, I soon realized that the teacher had an influence on my academic performance, which was deteriorated due to the conflict. This fact made me consider ways to solve the problem and develop strategies for regulating the conflict situation. The steps I have taken to regulate the relationship with the teacher can also be applied to conflict mediation within the working environment.

Dealing with a Difficult Teacher: Process Analysis

Considering Alternatives

First of all, when a conflict arises, it is necessary to consider alternatives or avoidance strategies. Within the working context, such an alternative might be to change the organization or department to avoid a relationship with the difficult boss. In this case, a change in position within the same company may be perceived by the boss as a personal insult, which will negatively affect the further activities of the subordinate (Silverman 6).

With regard to dealing with a difficult teacher, this assumption is most relevant since the team of school teachers communicates closely. Thus, it is necessary to understand whether there is a possibility of changing the organization. If this is not possible, then alternatives should be sought to improve the relationship with the boss or teacher. One of the most evident options may be to seek help from senior managers. However, this can become tricky because managers usually back their own people (Craig 323). Thus, it is not worth the risk, as, in case of failure, the conflict may escalate, causing additional problems.

Analyzing the Boss

Consequently, it is necessary to try to regulate the interpersonal relationship with the boss (or teacher) privately without involving third parties. To successfully achieve this goal, it is necessary first of all to analyze the position and qualities of the boss (or teacher). Cabarro and Kotter emphasize that understanding the boss and the context, as well as the situation, is crucial for finding a solution:

What are your bosss organizational and personal objectives, and what are his or her pressures, especially those from his or her own boss and others at the same level? What are your bosss long suites and blind spots? What is the preferred style of working? Does your boss like to get information through memos, formal meetings, or phone calls? Does he or she thrive on conflict or try to minimize it? Without this information, a manager is flying blind when dealing with the boss, and unnecessary conflicts, misunderstandings, and problems are inevitable (64).

An analysis of the personal and organizational values of the boss (or teacher) will help determine the causes of the conflict, which is the first step in resolving it. Chamorro-Premuzic notes that no matter how bad your boss is, they are probably consistent. In relation to the situation with my teacher, I decided to search for as much information as possible about him and his work at school. Upon completion of this process, I found out that he is much younger than the rest of the teachers in the school and also enjoys music and records his songs. Thus, I realized that he, like myself, has his own personal interests, for which he needs energy and time.

Thus, he cannot magically determine my needs and constantly take care of them, so he provides the information he considers relevant (Cabarro and Kotter 64). The insight obtained allows identifying qualities that have a significant impact on relationships, as well as regulatory strategies.

Evaluating Actions

Once the information is collected and analyzed, it is crucial to evaluate the actions of another side of the conflict and their impact on the deterioration of the situation. It is impossible to change the personality of a boss or subordinate, but awareness of the conflict and the desire to find ways to resolve it can make a significant difference (Cabarro and Kotter 65). In studying my actions and attitude towards the teacher, I noticed a number of reasons for the escalation of the conflict. First of all, my denial of the importance of his activities and my reluctance to follow directions caused more stress for both the teacher and me, which made him resist me.

Thus, he was under the pressure of my dissatisfaction and constant complaints about the ineffectiveness of his lessons (Chamorro-Premuzic). Moreover, my requirements for classes were overestimated, as I expected a personal approach that the teacher could not provide me in the school curriculum. Assessing the needs and opportunities of both parties allowed me to develop a coping strategy aimed at mutual benefit.

Articulating and Managing Expectations

Improving relationships requires that both the boss and the employee understand what is expected of them. Thus, it is necessary to articulate needs to the boss (or teacher) and also to acknowledge what expectations he or she has from a subordinate (or student) and what goals are set (Silverman 6). Clarifying mutual expectations will help eliminate misunderstandings that are the root cause of conflict. Additionally, it allows considering the attitude of the boss (or instructor) to the working process and the priorities that are set by him or her. An important factor is the bosss (or teachers) awareness of his influence on subordinates, which can be a key factor.

Often, after receiving feedback on their performance, bosses become more attentive to the needs of their subordinates (Pretorius 44). Thus, the most effective strategy is the open conversation with the boss about the subordinates needs and desires, during which it is necessary to express ideas and highlight opportunities.

Choosing Strategy

In the situation with my teacher during communication, I learned that the priority for him is the fulfillment of the set goals, and he does not intend to personalize his teaching style. Thus, having learned about my needs, the teacher did not seek to change his behavior that could be considered a failure. However, further confrontation would lead to an escalation of the conflict. In this situation, the wisest decision is to follow the instructions of the boss (or teacher), meeting his expectations.

This attitude allows for building more friendly relationships and a more positive perception of the subordinate from the bosss perspective, which may open future opportunities. In my situation of dealing with a difficult teacher, over time, he noticed my desire to end the conflict, which allowed me to improve my academic results. Thus, in order to improve relations, it is necessary first of all to assess the values and requirements of both parties and to build a strategy that would correspond to realistic expectations.

Annotated Bibliography

Cabarro, John J., and John P. Kotter. Managing Your Boss. Harvard Business Review: HRBs Must-Reads on Managing People, 2005, pp. 60-70.

This article describes the most effective strategies for managing a relationship with a troubled boss using a number of examples. The key factor that the authors highlight is the need to analyze the actions of both the subordinate and the boss. The authors describe how to build productive relationships within the team based on communication. The following are some practical tools for dealing with conflict situations. The main advantage of this article is a detailed description of each aspect that the authors emphasize, as well as an analysis of each example. The article provides valuable information for a process analysis as it allows considering what steps are needed to regulate relations and conflict situations between subordinates and the boss.

Chamorro-Premuzic, Tomas. How to Deal with a Boss Who Stresses You Out. Harvard Business Review. 2017. Web.

This web article is created by a professor of business psychology at University College London and at Columbia University, and an associate at Harvards Entrepreneurial Finance Lab, which makes it a credible source of information. In this article, the author discusses what factors significantly influence the relationship with a problem boss, as well as what characteristics are key. The most valuable information seems the information on what actions can be applied to regulate the conflict, depending on the specific character traits and actions of the boss. This article can also be used in the analysis as it allows us to consider the problem from the point of view of interpersonal relations and also provides specific tools for improving the situation.

Craig, Marveen. Dealing With a Difficult Boss. Journal of Diagnostic Medical Sonography, vol. 6, 1988, pp. 323-325. Web.

This article emphasizes that difficulties in dealing with problem bosses are ubiquitous. The author provides a classification of different types of bosses depending on their characteristics. Additionally, detailed descriptions and specific coping strategies are offered for each group. The author also notes that each of the distinguished types is rarely found in its pure form, and in order to select the most effective tools, it is necessary to mix techniques. The article is extremely useful for the process analysis as it provides an overview of possible difficulties that may arise in the relationship with bosses.

Pretorius, Marius. Difficult Bosses: Real Strategies for Surviving. Journal of Business Strategy, vol. 40, no. 3, 2019, pp. 35-47. Web.

This article describes the framework of legacy, which is an alternative typology of managers behavior. The author divides bosses and managers into four archetypes, depending on the style of their communication with subordinates, and therefore provides recommendations for regulating relations with representatives of each group. Legacy is presented as an alternative term for the influence that bosses and managers have on the work environment and employees. Thus, the article provides a wealth of information on the problems of relationships between bosses and subordinates and strategies for regulating them. The disadvantage of this study may be a rather limited classification; at the same time, the article also has a significant advantage in the form of discussing the use of the framework for the bosses themselves. Thus, the article can be used for analysis as it gives an idea not only of the perspective of subordinates but also the point of view of bosses and managers.

Silverman, David. Surviving the Boss from Hell. Harvard Business Review, vol. 87, no. 9., 2009, pp. 1-8.

This article is a case study with subsequent analysis and expert recommendations. The case describes the situation in which an employee plans to leave his job for work in another department due to an unsatisfactory relationship with his boss. However, he is concerned that, in the current economic environment, he is unable to leave to another organization and that he is being offered the same position as his current job. Since the main difficulty and reason for the planned change lies in the problem boss, three experts further analyze the case and give recommendations on how to regulate the relationship. This article is useful for the analysis as it provides three different perspectives on the situation and allows considering alternatives.

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